A Lovely Cruise -- And A Trip Home That Took Longer Than Columbus's

 So the remainder of the trip was one of fine food, drink, historical sightseeing, and great company with Joelle and Kenny.

A highlight for Wifey and me on the sightseeing front was in Avignon, during a lovely walking tour. Our guide showed us the Palace of the Popes -- turns out Avignon was the Vatican before the Vatican. We also toured a wonderful food mart, where we would return days later for Kenny and I to enjoy some delicious oysters.

But our small group was 2 late 60 Jewesses from LA, a lovely VERY Texas WASPY lady who was amazingly well traveled, Wifey and me, and Bob. Bob was wearing a U Tennessee sweatshirt, and he gave me business about my Canes colors - well deserved. He said his alma mater, UT, WAS back, and would surely beat Georgia the following day. They didn't.

But put a couple of college football fans together, and they talk a lot about their beloved sports -- Bob was from Chatanooga and had an accent that Faulkner couldn't have described as Southern enough.

Anyway, the guide walked past a very old synagogue, and asked if anyone wished to visit. Wifey and I said yes, as did the 2 Jewessess from LA. The Texan said "I'm a Baptist, but very much a Zionist -- Jews are my older brothers and sisters -- so I definitely want to see it." Bob was silent.

The guide knocked, and a woman answered -- and after giving us the required look over, let us in. I noticed something -- Bob kissed the mezuzah, and like me, put on a kippah! I asked what he was doing, and he said "What do you mean -- I'm Jewish!" Turns out he was ZBT at UT in the 60s and is a 4th generation Southern Jew -- his wife is from Asheville. I called him exotic, but then told him about my sons in law -- Jewish men from Bogota and Caracas. "Now THAT THERE is exotic!" Bob said.

The tour was great. They had uncovered a matzah oven from the early 1800s,  and it was not in use. The caretaker, a Sephardic lady who spoke French and Spanish (no Ladino) told us about the building -- they had regular services, though Avignon is no major center of French Jewry. Still -- it was a neat stop.

A low point, which turned out not so bad, was in Tain D' Hermitage, another village with medieval stuff to see. Wifey and I had a walking tour, which she opted out of, on account of her being Le Lazy that day. Kenny and Joelle had signed up for a more vigorous hike up a hill for an amazing view of the village, as well as a Mary statue. I kept up, though winded, and the guide warned us of the wet conditions -- especialy as we descended. Sure enough, at a slick patch of grass, my too ample tuches went down -- luckily just a sore back for a day or so. The following day, in Arles, a lady got hurt much worse -- she had to be taken by ambulance for a split open head -- luckily no worse damage.

We ate. So well. Gourmet food everywhere. Wifey LOVED the Lumiere Museum most of all. We had a farewell dinner in Avignon with our friends -- delicious gourmet Italian -- and the next day left on a train for Marseille, and an absurdly early flight the next am for Madrid.

I had another aging moment -- after going through security -- my wallet was missing. I wasn't even sure how to call the Best Western to ask if it had fallen out in the van. But as the gate agent was helping us, I checked a rarely used compartment in my carry on -- for some dumb ass reason, I placed the wallet there! Ah -- a relief, and we were off to Madrid.

Iberia got us there just in time to spend a full 7.5 hours in the enormous Madrid airport. Fortunately, our  tix got us into the Dali Lounge, which had showers, a nap room, and delicious food changed every few hours. Eventually, we boarded the Airbus for the 9.5 hour flight home -- it took an entire 24 hours from when we left out hotel.

Kenny and Joelle trained to Barcelona -- where they extended their trip until Saturday, and then fly non stop home to Miami. That would have been a much smarter thing for us to do -- but I did get to finally see "30 Rock," a funny show somehow I never watched when it came out.

MIA was packed, but our Global Entry got us straight through passport control. The UBer lanes were a mess, so we old schooled it and took a taxi through the rainy streets.

Ah -- so great to be home! And Wifey got her long awaited trip -- so good all around.

Of course, we returned to the political news that Florida is essentially all red now. I always try to look on the bright side -- no more having to pay for abortions, or gifts for gay weddings. Oh boy.

A late season storm was brewing -- Hurricane Nicole -- but word just came it was headed North of us -- so hopefully no tree limbs to clear.

I came to the office to avoid Miriam, our house cleaner, and since the storm ALMOST hit -- I get to be in a totally quiet space -- ain't no law work happening here for the rest of the week. It's like the vacation never ends!

Next up -- Wifey has to get her act together with the caterer for T Day -- coming sooner than later. Looks like 20 of us, give or take. The turkey won't be gourmet, but it will be surrounded with love. And that is pretty, pretty nice.