The Dissing Date

Wifey had a breathing class at the U today. Don't ask. Anyway, I drove her to campus, and walked around while she was occupied. It was a gorgeous day, and I always get nostalgic when on the campus.

I walked past one of the Residential Colleges, which was formerly the 1968 dorm, and recalled a funny anecdote involving a man who is now about the most successful human beings I know. In 1981, he was a tad awkward with the ladies...

I was sort of dating a freshman who would later become the first wife of a friend who is now a neurosurgeon in NY. My roommate Barry was single, and eminently eligible. He was tall, handsome, brilliant, and a great guy.

I met another freshman in my American Lit class, a freshman from Hollywood, Fla. She was cute, and most important on Barry's list of criteria: Jewish. I think her father was a physician in Broward. I told her about Barry, and my date, Rikki, Barry, and Lori (if that was her name --the years have faded my memory) made plans to go out.

We went to a restaurant in South Dade called Bogey's Barn, which was on a golf course. The best thing about Bogey's was that the dinners were modestly priced, and after you ate, you got free admission into their nightclub, where they had a decent band and dancing.

We all went and had a fine time. As I recall, we got back to campus around midnight, and walked Lori to her dorm in the 1969 complex. Invited the girls back to our apartment, where I had, I'm sure a few bottles of Mateus Rose or Lancer's (back then we were talking about $5 per bottle). Rikki agreed, but Lori said she had to get up early the next morning, and begged off.

Rikki, Barry, and I left, but Barry ran into another friend in the lobby of the complex, and stayed behind. A few hours later, when he returned to our apartment (Rikki had gone home) I asked him excitedly what he thought of Lori, and whether there would be a second date. His reply:

"Well, I ended up staying in the lobby for awhile, BS-ing with my friend, and then the elevator doors opened, and out popped Lori, in a much sexier outfit than she was wearing before, talking to her friends. She saw me and looked shocked, She stammered something about being ready to go to bed, and then her friends 'dragged her out again.' Off she went, and I stood there feeling like a loser."

I guess I should have offered support, but I think I laughed so hard I had to run to the bathroom. I knew, even then, this man was the ANTI-loser, destined for great things, and could stand a little rejection.

If there is poetic justice, Lori has been married and divorced, unhappily, about 4 times, and every once in while thinks about the tall sophomore she shined on in the lobby of the 1968 dorm in 1981.

Nah. She's probably living in a huge mansion in Boca, married to some dermatologist. I knew even before I got to UM that life wasn't fair.