Humility

 When any of us start thinking we're big deals, believing our own press releases, as the saying goes, it's great to get a sense of humility.

I got a wonderful dose of it back in 1994, when Paul and I started our law firm. I was 33, had made a ton of money the year before, and had that amount supplemented by the largesse of our property insurance company following Hurricane Andrew. They truly turned a lot of our crap into cash -- leaving us with a much enlarged house, and a rental house to boot.

Anyway, Paul felt, correctly, that we needed to project an image as successful lawyers, given that our clientele was far more likely to judge us by the cars we drove than ratings in Martindale Hubble. Paul had a black Benz, but I was driving a Mitsubishi Diamante, which to this day remains the best car for the money I have ever had. I leased it for $199 per month, in an intro deal from Mitsubishi, and it had leather seats and a CD player! It drove beautifully. But -- clients in Perrine were not going to be impressed by a Mitsubishi, and so I gave the car to Paul's then high school son Alex to drive, and I leased a Jaguar, a car I always associated with the king of sophistication, James Bond.

I went to the dealer, and picked out a sedan. As I saw on the bench waiting for it, I started to swell. Here I was -- 33, co-owner of a law practice, near 7 figures in the bank, and about to get into a freaking Jaguar! A young man, probably early 20s, was sitting next to me.

Forrest Gump-like, I greeted him and said I was waiting for my new car. He asked what it was, and I told him a Jaguar. "Wow -- cool," he said, and I agreed. I was Da Man! And then I heard the rumbling.

A car was approaching us, and it had an engine that literally shook us all up. It was his car, a Ferrari Gallardo, some special edition model -- of course -- bright red. The valet gave him the key, he said goodbye, and drove off.

I asked the salesman what that car cost -- it was 4 times the cost of my now schlepper Jag. My car came, I popped in a Grateful Dead CD, and drove off -- laughing. What a douchebag I was! It was as if the Big Man wanted me to get the lesson right away -- when you judge yourself by money, someone always has more!

Well, I got a magazine in the mail today that did the same thing. We're kind of proud that we endowed a scholarship at FIU -- it pays for young dietitians to be able to complete their internships that must be unpaid. This was no biggie for D1, we supported her, but many kids, especially at blue collar FIU, NEED their salary, and find it a major hardship to do without as they finish the required internships. So this fund pays for a couple of them each year. We contribute to it yearly -- not a tiny amount, but certainly nothing yuuuuge.

And FIU is terrific -- treating us like major donors. Just the other day I got a letter from our handler -- inviting Wifey and me to a South Beach Wine and Food Festival dinner in the Gables, which FIU sponsors. The tickets would have cost $600 for the pair! So FIU knows how to make the small fry supporters feel amazing.

On the other hand, the magazine from UM showcased my alma mater's donors. A lawyer I know, younger than I am who I'll call Scott, since that's his name, gave $5M for scholarships. Scott manages the practice for Roy, one of the top criminal defense lawyers in the US. I guess he hit it big, and is in a position to make those kinds of gifts.

There were also multiple, 7 figure gifts mentioned -- for the med school, Athletics, and even Music and Arts and Sciences. No wonder UM treats me friends and I, even those of us who have donated over 6 figures over the years, like little nothings. It's because we are!

I would love to come into huge money. I wouldn't change my lifestyle much, if at all, but would become a full time giver. Now THAT would be a wonderful job.

But for now, I assume the humility that comes from being reminded that even when you think you're all that -- you're not. We live in a beautiful house. Recently a relocated Bay Area investor bought TWO houses in our hood -- for a combined $6M! The houses don't adjoin -- I assume he bought them for relatives or close friends moving here from Cali.

I thought Wifey and I were big shots when we bought her parents a Century Village condo "on the vater," to stop my late suegra's world class nagging. We paid $120K for it! Ha. That were nothing, compared to my new absentee neighbor!

Humility is great. It keeps us grounded, and reminds us what is truly important. As I just wrote to D1 the other day, the truth is Wifey and I were as happy in 1989 living in our starter house, all 1500 square feet of it, as we are today, in our Ponderosa. 

There's always bigger and greater. I guess the key is to not let there be happier.