Nirvana at the Thai Restaurant

I never really mediate, or, really know techniques to attain higher consciousness. I pray, sometimes, but usually think I'm not doing it the right way. I mean, is it ok to ask the Big Man for stuff? Isn't there some higher language He uses?

Several times in my life, a sense of complete calm and good feeling came over me (without the use of alcohol or other drugs). I had one of the experiences last evening.

Two prior ones I remember came during enormous stress. The first time was when my Dad died. After the paramedics came into the "final barbershop," and took over CPR from the poor barber and me, my mother came upon the scene.

I would have expected to be panicked and rushed, but instead there was complete serenity in the room --as if some force was telling me it was meant to be that my father leave us.

Another time, I was in my boss's prop jet, and the plane was in major trouble after we took off from MIA. The pilot, his friend Bill, has since told me that in his 40 years of flying (and this fellow has had a flying career out of a Carl Hiassen novel), it was the closest he came to dying.

As the plane bumped and fought to keep in the air, I sat in the back, calmly envisioning my death. Again --that calm and serenity came over me. I wasn't at all scared --I was fully accepting.

The plane landed (or I wouldn't be here writing this) and I thought, wow --that was cool!

Last night, I had that same wonderful sensation again. It had been a stressful day, and D2 dropped me off at the Siam Lotus Room. She went home, and I sat there, alone in the dining room, waiting for Wifey, who had driven to the wrong restaurant.

They have a beautiful aquarium. I watched the fish swimming, and, all of a sudden, I was among them in my mind. I was completely calm. It was as if I had 4 vodkas, but I was only drinking green tea.

In the background, the two waitresses chatted in their language. It sounded like the most beautiful, lovely music was playing.

It was delightful.

I guess I'm always running on an undercurrent of anxiety, because I feel I have to be in control of things for so many.

Just yesterday, Wifey kept asking me advice about a trip I'm not going on! I nicely told her to please, every once in awhile, to keep me out of stuff...

So when I feel I'm NOT in control. when the word spins just fine without my fatherly, friendly, or lawyerly advice --it brings such comfort to my soul.

Meanwhile, Wifey showed up, and the food turned out to be below average. We'll stick to Thai Toni, our other place.

But I just might go back to Lotus Room for the tea...