The Decline of Aging Parents

Mom's been gone over a year now, and Wifey seems to have her elderly parents happy and stable. Ok, maybe not happy, but stable. Her Dad is at Miami Jewish Home, and Mother still living alone in Century Village, in Pembroke Pines. Since they're nearly 90, we know the other shoe will drop, eventually. But for now Wifey has things under control. Our dear friend Edna -- not so much. Her parents, meaner and far less loving versions of my in laws, are in decline, as well. They had mostly shut Edna out of their lives, focusing instead on her younger sister, whom they fully supported. The sister never saw any point in working -- instead having her condo, car, and expenses paid by her parents. Well, things turned south, and poor Edna has been pressed into service. She's hire lawyers and aids, and comes to South Florida from Atlanta often. She was due back next week, but her mother got Baker Acted. Apparently the old lady has stopped eating, and told a hospital doc she no longer wants to live. So Edna is here, dealing with getting her mother and probably father into nursing care, and sorting through the complicated and until recently secret finances of her parents. I feel for her. It's a thankless job -- her parents and sister are convinced Edna, a wealthy lady, is stealing from them. But Edna acts from a sense of duty -- she's simply doing the right thing for her declining parents. I admire her for that -- I see so many grown kids simply shirk these responsibilities. There's special fate waiting for them, I'm convinced. Meanwhile, D1 continues to amaze me. She works full time, sees private patients on the side, and does therapy dog work. She also volunteers with a group of young Jewish professionals, and today's paper featured their succesful project: crowd funding to buy new busses for elderly folks in Miam Dade. The "Busses for Bubbes" program lets the WW II folks have some freedom. D2's last day of cruise line internship is tomorrow, and then she heads to NYC for a fun weekend before returning to Gainesville and completion of her Master's degree. My friend John and I were chatting, and he said that when it's all said and done, between us we have three awesome daughters. I told him I agree -- the measure of a man, according to the great Sidney Poitier, is how he takes care of his family. The measure of a woman, too, and Edna measures up in a big way.