Perspective

I had contact with two friends this morning, and the content of each one's experience affected me.

First, I got an email from Dr. Barry, just back from speaking at the funeral of a 4 year old former patient, who died in Naples last week. The girl had received a multi organ transplant at age 6 months, was doing well, but then went into septic shock. Barry was in Miami with the child's mother and brother --ALSO a very sick child. He literally stayed on the phone with the Naples ER doc, during the "code" , until the father arrived.

The whole thing was dramatic. The father, racing down I-75 from Tampa, was pulled over by FHP. When he told the trooper his daughter was in extremis in Naples, the trooper called in a helicopter and flew the father to the hospital.

Anyway --Barry sent me a copy of the address he gave at the funeral, and it was stunningly powerful. I HATE that he's a better writer than I am. Not really. It was an amazing eulogy, filled with despair, but also hope.

And then, I got another call, from a very upset wifey friend. The subject is unimportant, but let's just say that, compared to lost children, it would appear trivial.

Yet to the friend, it was earth shattering. This poor woman was inconsolable.

I went to fetch the Sunday Herald, and saw Dr. Eric, a neighbor who's a practicing psychologist. We chatted, and then I brought up this diversity of grief.

He said that as a person, he always wants to tell his patients "Hey --get a life! You're upset about NOTHING! Have perspective --you have so much to be thankful for!"

But then, as a therapist, he has to remember that for someone living in a little snow globe, even a slight nudge can set off a blizzard.

He spends as much time counseling some patients getting over the death of a pet goldfish as he does patients who lose life long spouses, or children.

Dr. Eric's a great guy. NY Jewish sense of humor, just like mine. He has twin girls fraduating from high school, as well as a 3 year old from his current marriage. I asked him where his girls are going to school. One to UCF, the other has a list of "Most Expensive Colleges," and will choose from there. "She's still angry with me for divorcing her mother, and wants to make me pay."

Anyway --such is human nature. One person's speed bump is another's Mt. Everest.

All I know is --it's an early Sunday afternoon, and a breeze is blowing through the house. Wifey is out at a movie (with one fewer friend), and D2 just left for dance rehearsal. D1 called this am --all happy about a new young man in her life.

I have a sleeping Labrador and Bassett Hound at my feet, and an order of Canton wonton soup a phone call away.

Life is exquisite.