So yesterday was another example of why serious professional pursuits, other than, I guess, things like Pickleball, are truly best left to the young. I speak for myself only, of course, as I have plenty of friends still doing serious medicine, operating heavy machinery, etc...
I drove to Homestead to visit a friend who is in awful shape -- my age, and living in an ALF because of serious brain issues. There's no clear diagnosis yet, but the likely culprit seems to be a witches brew of traumatic encephalopathy from his years playing football and taking awful spills dirt bike riding, maybe long Covid brain fog -- he was stridently anti vax at the beginning of the plague, even though he had a very public job, and depression. More scary, there's talk he may have Lewy Body Disease, which is the sort of galloping Alzheimer's Robin Williams had and caused him to take an early exit.
Anyway, I was waiting to go visit, and I guess was distracted, when I got an email from our lawyer Scott about the annoying, ongoing fee case we have with the TV lawyer named Robert, who I call Saul Goodman. The email was a request from Saul's lawyer, who I call either the hairless, fat disgusting pig, or, if I feel ironic, the Victoria's Secret Model, since the woman is the very antonym of a VC model, to take "some of the fee" out of his trust account, since we don't claim all of it.
A ha! I had long held that Saul was far more desperate for the money than we, on account of Paul and I have no real overhead, and Stuart's is most modest. So when I saw that, I replied to Scott in rather spicy terms, including the fact that Saul is 72 is married to a thirty something, and clearly she only had relations with him because of his money, and that made him even MORE desperate. Fortunately, I didn't write any of the horrible things about the physical appearance of his associate lawyer.
Well -- turns out that the VC model had been copied on the email! Since I read it on my phone's small screen, I missed that. She replied "I don't think this was intended for me, but rest assured the cash flow of the firm is very strong. Right. That's why she wants to go to the judge and get at least some of the money.
But again, since I'm lucky, my mis sent email didn't mention the insults I typically make towards the woman lawyer. That would have been bad. First, I never want to make fun of a woman's ugliness or stringy, thinning hair, or immense size directly to her. And second, in this "Me Too" era, my blunder may have gotten me in deeper trouble.
It was yesterday's second miscue, but the first was actually profitable. After dropping the dogs at a local groomer, since they needed to be there by 830 which to Wifey is the same as 330 am, I walked over to La Boulangerie, a French inspired spot owned by Venezuelan Jews. It was VERY loud -- two huge tables of women, probably teachers preparing for Monday's school opening. I got something for Wifey, to go, and left. Later in the day, I got a call from Bank of America in Sunniland, asking if I had eaten there earlier. I had.
Well, there was a woman at BOA with my blue Visa card. She was at the next table, and the waitress had given us each the other's card back! They were both blue colored Visas, and so neither of us noticed. Could I come in to make the switch? I could, but after my stop at Angel's Hatchery, where I had stopped to treat myself to some new little koi and cichlids for my pond. I pulled up to Sunniland a few minutes late, as I got stopped at every single traffic light on South Dixie.
I walked in -- and recognized the lady. She had been at the next table -- I said with her boyfriend. No, she said, it was her SON -- she was, she volunteered, 54 and her son in high school but did indeed look much older. I said something charming about she could be in high school, and then she told me she was a recent NYC transplant who had already gone back to La Boulangerie and got them to credit both checks -- and so Wifey and my $30 breakfast was free! Finally! Something good for the rich white man!
Anyway, Victoria and I chatted -- she asked me for other good breakfast places, and I directed her to LOL and Bagel Emporium. I asked why she had moved, and she said that while she loved the City, it was no longer tenable to live there -- her kids were all harassed on the subway and even Central Park near her Upper East Side home, and that since she could run her business remotely, it was time to flee.
I told her that D2 and Jonathan had moved in '19, and had they stayed, I'd have been compelled to subsidize their lifestyle with UBer and Lyyt -- no subways anymore, unless and until another pre crazy Giuliani returns like a tough sheriff and gets Gotham back to liveable condition.
Anyway, it was a nice meeting, and profitable, too.
But as for lawyer emails -- only on a big screen for me, going forward. Heaven knows where some of my offensive missives might land otherwise.
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