La Suegra Dificil

Ah, my mother in law...She survived the Holocaust, and clearly survivors need to be tough. She is. She's tiny, deaf, and stubborn as a mule. She's a candidate for cochlear implant surgery, to restore hearing in one ear, but refuses -- lest there be a complication and she end up in a nursing home like her husband. Wifey is her only child, and bears all of the unpleanantness in dealing with her mother. Wifey does everything for her -- finances, arranging rides, arranging housekeeping -- but my mother in law doesn't accept these gifts graciously -- she gives Wifey guilt barbs whenever she can. She was an awesome grandmother. She lived for my Ds -- still does, though lately her life advice, on matters such as dealing with broken hearts, is heavy handed and hurtful. She means well, but when you tell a young girl getting over a boyfriend that "I had vun love -- and I still miss him every day after 70 years" well, that doesn't exactly comfort. So yesterday Wifey and I drove our wonderful overnight guest, Dr. Barry's boy Josh -- back home. Josh was at the U for a computer lecture, and we fetched him. It was delightful -- he's maturing into a great young man, although he marches to his own drummer. Although he doesn't make stellar grades, I told Dr. Barry I have no doubt he'll end up richer than just abuot any of our friends' kids -- after inventing some type of app or whatever it's called. Anyway, after dropping Josh off, wee picked up Wifey's mother -- and took her to buy a new refrigerator, and then for lunch. It was trying. She talks WAY too loud, and then gets livid when Wifey tries to quiet her. She screams for the waiter if her coffee isn't immediatley available, and steaming hot. She demands Wifey look at her when she talks AT Wifey... All in all, not a pleasant lunch date. When we drove her back to the condo, the lawn guys were there, leaf blowers in full throttle whine. Wifey turned to me and said "You know -- that's exactly how my mother's voice sounds to me." I doubled over in laughter. I guess humor is the only way to deal with difficult suegras...