Losing My Religion

Years ago, there was a Counting Crows song where the lapsed Jewish singer songwriter Adam Duritz said he "wants to be someone who believes." That truly resonated with me. It still does.

Wifey and I went to our rich neighbors' house at the invitation of our rabbi friend Yossi. It was one of their holidays: the 110th birthday of their cherished leader, the Rebbe. We gathered and a rabbi from Boca sang with a guitar accompaniment -- songs he had written about Judaism and the Rebbe.

The rabbi had a nice enough voice, and the songs were a mix of Al Stewart tunes and power ballads. The young guitarist was fine. But the lyrics were all, well, about their brand of Judaism -- praising the dead Rebbe, and singing about how he still lives, even though he died in the early 90s...

There was a guilty pleasure for a jerk like me, though. Chasids don't allow women to sing in public in front of men -- too sexually stimulating. So it was a rare night where some of the wigged ladies were softly mouthing the lyrics as a the rabbi did his James Taylor. I'm happy to report I was not overcome with lust...but I realized it WAS the first time I saw Chasid ladies sing in public.

On the way home, Wifey remarked how it reminded her of Christian music -- the hip kind. Every once in awhile she'll hear a nice folk or rock tune, and get into it, and then realize the lyrics are about Jesus! And she gets all annoyed and turns it off. Obviously, last night's rabbi has the same desire -- to get baby boomers to hear the message. He even referenced a Doors song...

And then I came home and checked FaceBook (tm). My friend Julie posted photos showing that some Born Again types had parked in front of Palmetto Middle School to hand out bibles to students as they walked in. And we're in Pinecrest -- upscale, cosmpopolitan Pinecrest -- not Oklahoma or Alabama!

Most of the comments echoed my thoughts -- keep your damn religion to yourself, and especially don't try to ram in down other kids' throats, but a few of Julie's friends lauded the effort. One poster, who I recognized as the daughter of a crooked judge who was de-benched years ago for taking bribes, has apparently become an evangelical Christian although she was raised a Jew. She said it was a great thing -- that back in the day when God was in the schools, there were no metal detectors, or violence, or other modern unpleasantness. But there WERE really really bad judges, I wanted to snarkily remind her -- like your POS father...

My Rabbi and his wife are just like Mormons --unfailingly upbeat and optimistic. They invited us to their community seder. We went to that once -- 5 hours of listening to the story, and bad food and cranky kids. I politely declined, but we WILL be at a seder, such as it is -- my friend Stuart's house, who promises heavy on the food and drinking, and light on the "message."

I truly wish I believed. But from deep in my heart, or soul, I guess, my father's teaching keeps bubbling up -- that it's all soo much bullshit, designed to separate the feeble minded from their money.

Maybe I need to drink more this coming Purim, and look skyward...