RIP, Don, A Life Well Lived

 So at Amanda's wedding Saturday night, I saw Loni's brother Greg in the corner of the historic venue, just getting off a cell phone call. I went over to say hello, and he greeted me, but then said "Sorry, Dave -- not to be un social, but I'm dealing with my Dad's health crisis back in Atlanta." I wished him the best and immediately backed off -- I had LOTS of experience in dealing with declining parents and felt for him right away.

Loni's Dad Don was VERY well known in Miami -- a true football hero in the late 50s for the Canes. He led the team to a Top 10 ranking, and was drafted by the Redskins in the First Round. He starred for them, too -- Redskins fans of a certain age ALL know him as "The Bull" -- he played like the later generation Larry Csonka -- you needed several guys to tackle him. When the Redskins had their "70 Best Players in 70 Years," Don was way up the list. He made the College Football Hall of Fame, as well as the UM Hall, of course.

I met Don in 1983, when Loni was dating Mike. Mike's Dad Ed, one of my life's mentors and a HUGE Canes fan, was, I know, thrilled that his boy was dating the daughter of true Canes royalty. The thing was, when you met Don, you'd have found his fame and success hard to believe. First, he had thinned down from his "The Bull" days, and was so humble and soft spoken -- he used to ask me about MY experiences at UM, which were far less well known than his.

After football, Don and Marcia settled nicely into their lives. Marcia taught school in Miami for many years -- Don became a VP at Prudential Bache -- my current FA Pat worked with him in the 80s.

And Don became what I truly admired -- an amazing husband, father, grandfather, and, at the end, great- grandfather. His three kids all married well. His girls, Loni and Cassie, live here, and Greg manages a huge law firm in Atlanta. Combined they gave Don and Marcia 8 grandkids -- the oldest of whom, Amanda, just got married last weekend in LA.

Loni cared so beautifully for her parents as they aged, and finally, about a year or so ago, they moved to Atlanta -- to a great ALF near Greg and his wife Summer. I was so happy for Loni -- after years of bearing the main load, it was a relief to have it shared with her brother.

Apparently Don's mental status declined recently -- certainly since I last saw him. A lot of it was probably from his days as a football player -- back then concussions were like coughs in a cold -- you kept playing after "getting your bell rung."

Sure enough, Mike called Tuesday. Loni had changed plans -- flying from LA to Atlanta to be by Don's side. And he died yesterday, surrounded by many of those he loved and who loved him.

I think the plan is for cremation and then interment at a Catholic cemetery in Miami -- one famous for having Jackie Gleason buried there. Jackie's memorial says "And away we go..."

It's fitting. Jackie was known as "The Great One," partly because of his immense talents, and comically because of his size. Don was a great one, too -- to his family and friends.

Wifey noted last night that to her observation, with the exception of a few outliers, the late 80s is THE time to check out. It's when the decline becomes real. It was certainly true of my Mom and Wifey's Dad -- in Mom's case, crashing her car at 89 was the signal event marking the beginning of the end.

So Don did the end right, as he lived his life -- the correct way. May his memory be a blessing.