So Dr. Barry's mother, 82 and sick with Parkinson's, had a very tough last year -- in a nursing home in Boca. She was given the most loving and attentive care by Barry and his sister Phyllis, as well as an aide named Alex, an Austian lady who sat with Beverly each day in addition to the full staff.
Alas, on Friday night, the Big Man decided it was time, and Beverly passed in the evening, peacefully, with her loving family at her side.
I knew as tough and big a guy as he is, Barry needed some of his boys there. And, I was to leave the next day for Naples with my grandsons and Joey. I thought about canceling, knowing 5 and 3 year old boys would somehow survive the disappointment . And then we had a conference call -- Eric -- the third stooge from our college days, called in. How about he and Dana visit Saturday, and I take the Sunday shift, on what we ended up calling the pre-shiva.
They did, and enjoyed the love and togetherness we've all shared during the loss of all 6 of our beloved parents. Bev was the last to go. My Dad Hy was first, in 1982, and my first nights sleeping in Delray had Eric on the floor mattress next to me -- bringing more comfort than I think I ever let him know -- until the other day.
Sunday Joey and the boys and I arrived at Barry's house, and the 2 monkeys cheered the grownups -- by then Scott and Samantha had flown to town, and Donna puttered about preparing for the shiva. We shared some laughs watching both Scott and Barry and Samantha's Jets AND my Dolphins lose -- comic relief for a tough weekend. And we told tales of yore and of days to come.
Phyllis and Marty came by later, as did Wifey, who had spent Saturday with D1 following an Aventura birthday party for our friend Allison, and we were joined by Phyllis's best USF friend, Eleanor. Young Josh was there, too.
I truly sensed Beverly, who loved her family fiercely, was smiling down at the group. The funeral is delayed to Wednesday, on account of, it seems, a shortage of staff in the mortuary biz, which allowed Barry to summon one of our favorite lines, from "The In Laws," about there being red tape in The Bush...
We'll gather Wednesday, and Thursday, to remember and honor a true woman of valor, as the Shabbos prayer describes.
But the lesson to me, as it usually is, is that I know it's possible to get through this life without friends, but I don't know truly how, or why anyone would choose to.
As I was across the Everglades Saturday, I knew Eric had Barry's back, and yesterday Eric knew I did. We three have a brotherhood 4.5 decades long -- from teenagers to near Medicare recipients. We went from 3 undergraduates to husbands and fathers of a combined 3 men and 3 women, and a total of 6 grandkids, with, Big Man willing, more of those precious souls on the way.
My law partner and big brother Paul marvels at how each of our friends became shared, and that's an amazing blessing, too. And most will gather Wednesday in support and love of our dear Barry as he navigates the status none of us wish, even in our 60s: orphan.
Of our group of 3 and our wives, now only Dana's Dad Ron stands among us. And long may he run...
As Don Henley sang, in a NY minute...everything can change. And so it was Friday, when we all went from the drama of our Canes losing their first game, to far more serious issues.
I think of song lyrics and movie lines all the time, and this am another lyric came into my mind: Greg Allman's take on life: "With the help of God...and two friends...I can do most anything."
And that's been our truth.
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